What factors define our attitude and how to develop a positive attitude? Part-1

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Often we hear and read  about positive attitude. But the question is how to develop a positive attitude?

What are the factors that define our attitude and what can we do to effectively channelize those factors for success in life ?


At abroad level, there are 5 main factors


  1. Self-Identification on basis of physical body vs thoughts.

     We often identify ourselves with our body and our possessions.  Essentially, this self-identification is not wrong, but it has many repercussions.

     Our existence is indeed  our bodies and possessions, externally. Someone may be tall, other short in height. Someone fair, dark, brown, long nose, small eyes etc. And similarly, rich, poor, middle class etc.  This is a hard fact and we should not try to escape from them by super-imposing some artificial ideas.  

    Do you remember your childhood? Even though, we may have different body now as and adult, but somehow we feel that we are “the same”  person. In childhood, we may not have all the knowledge about world , but it doesn’t mean that person was not us. Your expressions, dealings, behavior, requirements, body everything was different, but still  the “you”  who has experienced all those is same now and then.

  Today, at this very moment also we are experiencing something and this interaction  with the world around us will go on.  But, still its “you” , always.

    Hope you know, every few days, old cells from our body get replaced by new cells, even brain cells. Then, what is “that” which is remembering and experiencing all these ?

    We will not go into the philosophy of “soul”, not because it’s not a good concept, because i have not yet experienced or realized with definite confirmation that its “soul” inside me who actually is “me” and doing, experiencing all this.

   We will focus on a different “level” of world around us, beyond the physical world. This world very much exist, it’s all around us. We cannot see it directly through our eyes, but no one can deny that it exist. And that world is “World of thoughts”.

  The way in this physical world, we have certain type of body, say fat, slim, tall, short, fair, dark etc with one head, 2 hands and 2 legs. Similarly, in the world of thoughts also, we have our distinctive bodies made up of various combinations of thoughts.   Our “body of thoughts”  also have one centralized idea  on basis of which it attaches various sub-branches of thoughts to itself.

   Generally this “central idea” of our “thought body”  comes from our religious belief.  The main role of any religion in this world, actually is to define this central idea of existence. It defines who we are, why we came  here on earth, what is the “aim” of life, what will after we leave earth etc.

That’s why even for thousands of years, religion has exist in one or other form ,just to fulfill this requirement to define the central idea of our “thought body”.  Even, atheist has this “compulsory” requirement. Instead of religion, they try to define it with some scientific jargon or ideas.

     Though this central idea is the most important part of our mental body, but its often not the most prominent one, at least in common people.  It’s like foundation and main pillar of a building. Main pillar and many sub-pillars are there, but we often see or collect and put other things in a house, like furniture, door, windows, height, width of house.

     Similarly, We constantly acquire new ideas and thoughts and put it on top of our “thought body”. Most of these thoughts are trivial and get buried deep into others, however few are very prominent. These prominent thoughts are those with whom we specially identify our selves  or which  have made some significant impact on us. Sometime, one single prominent thought acquired by either experience or accident can hide/suppress all other related or contradictory thoughts and itself becomes the prominent factor to define our behavior.

     Please make no mistake that this “thought body” is something external to us and have no effect on this.  On the contrary, this “thought body”  is the “actual” driving force for all our attitudes, behavior and actions.

    It’s like the central control mechanism.  Our physical body is just an order carrier, it’s just a physical machine, listening and obeying to our “thought body”. 

  And you know what is the beauty of this “thought world” ?  You can change your thoughts , even the central foundation thought. Though, it’s not quite easy.

   Generally, central idea need not be changed because mostly they are “essentially” same with slightly different flavors all over the world.

    Now, when we say that “parts of thoughts body”  can be changed “at will”, it means there is something even higher than “thought body” who is thinking and willing, who decides which thought to keep, which one to discard or disregard. People often refer to it as ” The Soul”. I would say, i don’t know.

   May be “thought body” itself decides that certain thoughts are not in sync with its overall “aim”  or picture of existence. This thought body is made up of all our ideas, desires emotions, experience, memories.


So, when thought body analyzes itself (that’s why meditation is important), it may find that certain thoughts are not fitting  themselves in the body, they are contradictory. Let’s say, the desire is to succeed in an exam. But there may be some thoughts to waste time, like to watch movie or go to pub.


There may be important situations when some of our actions or direction of activities are not in sync of our “over all”  ideas of “rightful existence”. At that we have to do lots of changes in our thought processes,  may be even our external environment, place of living, jobs, minor desires etc.

   So, the summary is, if we realize that some of our thoughts are actually hindrance to what we want, then we should know that we are in control. We can either change those “negative” thoughts  or simply ignore them or make other positive thoughts prominent.

   Let’s say our “negative self -image ” is making us unhappy. We brood over again and again on being fat, short, dark skinned, skinny etc.  then what are the options we have

  1. Accept the truth. Don’t try to create a “perfect artificial self-physical body” image. But know that’s not “all-in-all” .

  1.1 If there is something that can be done for them, then plan and DO it. You want to loose weight, look fairer, be healthier, want more success, money and love in life. Great.

  Accept that you want them, plan, take guidance from loved ones, family, friends, professionals and happily work to achieve them.

  1.2 If nothing can be done ,then simply accept it and move on.  Some problem, short-coming in life for which nothing can be done. Then what is the use of brooding over them. Its not going to solve it.

Ask your thought body to shift focus to other better things.  Aim for higher .

Let’s say you have strong desire to serve poor and sick people of world. Will it make any difference if you are short in height. No !!

Will you be able to do it? 

Yes !!! Always.



Generally, the best medicine for depression, negative self-image  is selfless service to others. Focus your find to positive things. How you can positively help people, expecting nothing in return ? And be rest assured, you will not have time or you will not even wish to go into depression on your “little” short comings.

  Accepting the truth empowers you to take action on it and  channelizing our thought process towards solution or something better.

  1. You judge other people based upon physical bodily appearances or economical status. OR worse, you constantly worry other are “always” judging you about your physical appearances or economical status.

    Let them do it.

  But your focus should not be on these things. It doesn’t mean you ignore it.Accept it. It’s a reality.

Have you ever met people who are happier, though they may be shorter, fatter than you ? They have smile in their face. In fact, they may have a beautiful heart filled with love.


Know it for sure, if there is love in your heart, nothing is more precious than that in entire creation. Love make life really beautiful. Don’t expect others to love you. It’s selfishness. Love others and try to help them without expecting anything in return and then you will get abundance of love in life, which you may not have ever imagined.

This positive outlook of life will outshine all the darkness in life.

Respect people for their thoughts and show compassion for those whom you can help.

 Remember, you can change your thought body, at will.




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